Saturday, December 14, 2013

Day TWO

Last night, I went to bed with thoughts of blogging careening through my head.  It's exciting, you know?  To start a new adventure, doing something you don't consider a personal strength?  Exhilarating, actually.*

Facebook is doing a new thing - your "year in review" - and it's actually a pretty neat thing.  Here's mine: emelle's year in review.  The "machine" that is Facebook did a pretty good job of encapsulating MY 2013.  How'd they do that?  Do they have a thousand monkeys sitting at a thousand typewriters, trying to write Shakespeare, and they ended up capturing my highlights instead?  Hmm.

So anyway, Day Two.  Yesterday, I did complete the required Ab Workout.  I unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher.  I made progress on the hubby's computer fixes.  I got to talk on the phone to my own personal "Tech Support in India" (Daddy), and even though he was "celebrating" marking the passage of another anniversary without Mommy (she died in 2006), he seemed in good spirits, and our conversations, while mostly tech, were fairly lively.  I don't know that I cried over anything, but I did laugh and think, so I hit 2/3 of Jimmy V's daily goals.  Overall, a Not-Too-Shabby Day!

Hubby gets home from work and we both ask "how was your day?"  His response is "crappy" (or something to that effect); mine is "fine, okay, whatever" (or something to that effect).  He asks me about the progress on his computer and then thanks me for my efforts.  He goes out to the living room to log in to the netbook and check all his online stuff while tuning in to ESPN or some such to hear his sporting news.  I'm in the office playing Solitaire (I know, lame, right?  I'm not even using ACTUAL playing cards; I'm clicking a mouse).

Minutes pass, and he says, "you didn't tell me you started a BLOG today!" to which I respond, winkingly, "you didn't ask!" and the conversation spirals from there - "I didn't ask yesterday.  How could I know to ask today?  You said your day was 'fine'..." etc. from the living room, and my smirking responses from the office.  I'm having a good time, enjoying this repartee a room apart, until I hear what sounds like muttering, under the breath, self-doubt or self-blame coming from the living room.  That was NOT how I planned this conversation, so

I ask, "are you upset that I didn't tell you I started a blog today?"
He replies, "why would I be upset about that?"
"I don't know - you sound grumpy.  I figure you're grumpy with me."
"My customers were grumpy today," he says.  "I'm sorry that I snapped at you."
"You didn't snap at me.  I'm sorry your day was bad, and I'm sorry that I didn't tell you I'd started a blog.  I honestly didn't think of it when you asked how my day was, and I knew you'd discover it on your own."

... and then later, when I ask if he'd actually read it, he says, "yeah.  It sounds... bloggy, like a blog."

YAY!  I sound bloggy!

*What I don't consider a "personal strength" is WRITING.  I'm an actor, meaning I can portray a character someone else has created.  I'm a Voice Actor, meaning I can bring life and character to words someone else has written.  I'm a Script Supervisor, which means I can take copious detailed notes on scenes that I'm seeing and generate reports to help the director and editor piece together a fine filmed work.  I don't have a vision of how stories should be told, so I'm not a Director.  I also don't have stories in my head that are begging to be told, or at least, this is what I've told myself for my whole life.  This blog is a step outside of my comfort zone, to see if I DO have stories to tell.  If I end up, a year from now, having only documented my life as it happens, then we will all know: I am NOT a Writer.  If, however, this blog transforms into "stories," then it will have been a period of personal growth for me, and hopefully, a fun ride for you.  My HUSBAND is already a Writer.  The reason I thought he may have been "upset" with me is that I'm venturing into HIS territory.  I'm not doing this for any kind of capricious reason.  I'm looking to grow here.  I may step on some toes along the way, but I hope that they don't belong to my loved ones, and I hope I don't do it in my first week!

1 comment:

I LOVE your feedback; give it to me, Baby. Uh-huh, uh-huh.