Friday, April 22, 2016

A Day Off

I know what you're thinking. You're all like, STFU, Bitch, I know you always have the days off, and when you gonna get your ass to work? But of course, my response is, Bitch, you know that I wish I were workin', so get off my ass about it! And then you're all like, Bitch, why we callin' each other bitches here? So I'm like, Hey, yeah, let's stop that and get on with me talking about a Day Off...
PURPLE for Prince today.
Purple eyeliner (yes, on my "day off"), purple framed glasses, purple nails, purple cami, purple shorts.
Yes, I was using Prince's death as an excuse to be a grape. Shut up.
Sorry. I wanna talk about when my Day Off coincides with one of Stephen's. Ya know, like today.

First: Stephen, in his downtime, is a writer and a gamer. He might argue my specifying "downtime" but I honestly don't have any idea how much "uptime" brainpower he devotes to either writing or gaming. I know that when he's at his job or walking to or from that job, he's not on his computer. He's probably also not even on his phone much during that "uptime", because, ya know, needing to be focused on things like work or getting somewhere safely. So for the sake of "argument", I'm labeling "downtime" any time that is not spent focused on work or getting there. In my downtime, I fart around online; I get my steps in; I look for work; I try to do at least one productive domestic task; I pet the kitties; I blog.

So when Stephen has a morning off or a full Day Off from his forty-hours/week job, he writes, and he plays video games. He also checks various internet sites, and if he's really needing to calm his brain, he'll color. Aside: he's very good at the coloring. If Stephen's morning off coincides with me not working, he'll get out of bed at whatever hour suits him, and he'll leave me sleeping so he can do whatever in the living room. I stay in bed, even if I'm awake, for many hours in the morning, so as not to disturb his writing. Because frankly, I don't know what order his creative juices flow, or whether there's any kind of "pattern" established. I do not want to be the non-creative interrupting creativity. THAT would make me a Bitch.

When I do eventually venture out into the living room, Stephen will typically acknowledge my verticality. This morning, I had used up all the juice in my phone, so when I came into the living room, it was merely to plug that bad boy in. I wasn't staying. He asked if I was going back to bed, but it was already after 11, so I let him know that no, I was going to jump in the shower. He went back to whatever it was he was doing, and when I returned to eat a little breakfast, I made the mistake of suggesting to him a Costco walking, sampling lunch and grocery run. This suddenly became pressure for him, you see; I was establishing a schedule for our Day Off. His mistake was not just saying, hey, I'm writing, so can we talk when I'm done? Because, if I know that's what he's in the middle of, then he can know that I'm not trying to pressure him. At All.

So we both made mistakes in that moment, and the suggestion turned into a conversation, and that turned into pressure, and we both got a little angsty, in that moment. Once he'd set his laptop down, I knew he was done, so I apologized for my mistake, informed him of his mistake, and we both got down from the ledge we'd climbed. Don't worry, it was only about six inches off the floor, and about three feet wide, so it's not like "jumping" or "falling" would have hurt either of us.

We walked to Costco, kids. We did the walking, sampling lunch. We circled back and "weighed" the items we were considering carrying home, and then, after a little bit of math, we actually put the appropriate items in the cart and checked out. I'd carried four grocery bags with us, and when we left, I had about ten pounds of stuff evenly distributed between two bags for myself, and Stephen carried the ten pounds of carrots. Yes, Stephen likes carrots enough that we buy ten pounds of organic carrots at Costco, cheaper than we'd buy a much smaller quantity of even just ordinary carrots somewhere else. Hard to decide to carry ten pounds home on a walk, but Stephen was okay, as long as I was okay with the other ten pounds of stuff. I never in a million years ever imagined shopping at Costco ON FOOT on as regular a basis as I do.

Once we were home from our shopping, I found time to take another walk to get my steps in, and Stephen spent plenty of "downtime" playing games. It was a pretty good Day Off. I did submit myself for work, but I'm not yet booked for weekend or Monday. One of these days, they're going to rush call me for something. I'm ready. I'm available. Please send me to work, because I really don't like having too many consecutive Days Off.

Do YOU do things differently on your Days Off? Tell me about 'em.


  1. Bitch, stop being a lazy slacker and get up before 11. What are you a teenager?!?!? You're lucky I'm not your dad, I'd have come over and kicked your lazy ass out of bed. :)

    1. Bitch, thank you for that morning LOL. If you'd read carefully, you'd see that I WAS up before 11; I was giving Stephen his SPACE. And frankly, YOU are the one who's lucky you're not my dad, because I dare ya to even TRY to kick a lazy teenager's ass outta bed! HA! Just wait; your boys aren't teenagers yet - you still have that ahead of you.

      I am so happy and grateful to have never had teenagers to raise, nor tweens, nor pre-adolescents, nor toddlers, nor infants. I am IMMENSELY grateful to not be raising children in this electronic age! I have no idea how people do it. My hat's off to all of you.


    2. Just wait. They'll feel the heel of my foot soon enough. LOL

      As bad as some of it is, there is actually more payoff then people think. Also, unlike a lot of stupid parents out there, our kids don't use electronics much. They get maybe 1 or 2 hours on Saturday and Sunday if they do all their chores. We're pretty strict. It's really not that hard. I think too many people just use the electronics as babysitters or because they're too weak to say no to their kids. I kick the kids outside rather then let them play electronics. If you act like you write, you'd probably be the same as us and would be just fine. And just FYI, I am not saying we are perfect parents or that my kids are perfect. Far from it. But I love them just the same, more then anything.

      And I'd still kick your ass out of bed. Or sit on you're head and fart, I think that would do it. I have three sisters I know how to deal with girls. ;)

    3. If you sit on my face and fart, you're gonna get nut-punched. Jus' sayin'.

      Glad to hear that your boys are limited in their access to electronics. Too many kids out there are losing their eyesight just from holding the gadgets too damn close to their faces!

    4. Yeah, laugh it up, Fuzzball.


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